Movie reviews

1. Me and You and Everyone I know - B++
2. Scary Movie 4 - D
3. My Date with Drew - B
4. The Omen - C-

After 6 Easts of GM, I finally got home at around 9. I bought my breakfast at McDonald's (known as M-C-Donald, according to someone). Yet, the coke was spilt over the entire breakfast case. Whatever. 好的一餐, 不好的又一餐.

Before I fell into a long coma. I asked myself: Why would people love me? The ultimate big question. People around me are all dating, which does not bother me at all. I am happy for them, just that in certain tiny split of seconds, the sense of loneliness would irritate me. 我心眼少, 想法多. After I have finished the new chapter on my thesis, I finally have the time to experience the pleasure of this tiny pain. Such kind of time is a luxury in life.

"Nobody ever died of a broken heart. You'll get over it." (Written on the Body, Jeanette Winterson)

My sister is in love. They are sweetly in love in their apartment I have not yet visited. They have a world of their own. She told me they have a common goal of working in Taiwan. Common goal, another luxury I have not yet shared and found with the one for me.

27. Looking into the mirror, things have changed. 我老化了. 老化 is different from 老. 老化 means decaying, a loss of something which you can't retrieve. 老 simply means not young. I am 27, still very young.

He knows how to drive and has a good taste of living. He is in love. He is caring, independent, sincere and mature. He is in love. He wears Dior Homme and makes a reputation of being so. He is in love. He manages to find another one to stop being the third party in a relationship. He is in love. He has been suspected to have an affair. Numerous breakups were said. He is still in love. He decided to dump his boyfriend because he thought he deserved someone better. But they are dining tonight with him tonight. He is in love. He has been finding the most simple mode of love, but ending up moving from one person to another. He is in love, I guess. He loved another one besides his boyfriend and lied to others that he has never been serious with him. He is in love, I guess. He works in IT, looks young (he is young). He is stylish and looks Japanese. He is in love.

As a 27 man, I do seem to lack many things - I don't know how to drive, not to mention owning a car. I don't have savings in my bank account. I don't have a stable and foreseeable future with a well-paid job (even my mom is worried about it). I don't dress up, in fact, i gave up dressing up. Fuck it, you know I despise such materialistic measurements on how one should live. I only have countless books and DVDs at my home. I don't even know what I should do with my studies after I'm 30. I was told to support my family and looked for a well-paid job. Money is not my concern. It has never been. It is just a point of nuisance to me.

I seem to have found myself after I started my studies all over again. This self I believe I have is never agreeable by outsiders. Either I am really myself, or I am the one that others seem to expect me to be. I am happy and desperate at the same time. Enjoying my solitude and in need of something to be complete.

自問自己幾好　
有怨不報
離別我　離別好
自問健康幾好　
眼看得到強健到　
明明吞了剃刀　
都要上路

情人離開　
仍然永遠記得進步　
情人難保　
我已很堅強　
於谷底　玩跳高

可惜好想咳一聲　
卻又咳不到　
有話講得出聽不到　
要告不告　
要吐不吐　
難道為掛念你患上感冒　

原本想狠狠咳一咳　
卻又咳不到　
有罪然而無被告　
你怎麼不見人　
我太長情　
或太疲勞　
或者太用腦　
或欠擁抱